Friday, March 30, 2012

My Elephant Pregnancy

I've been thinking about this post for awhile, sad but true. Today marks nine months since we went on our agency's wait list. Why is this significant you may ask? Well, whenever I've gotten to this point when I was waiting to meet one of my children I was always so relieved to be at this point. I KNEW I would be seeing this precious little one's face very very soon. For this next child I can't quite say that. Sure God could do anything he wanted and move us to the top of this list for no apparent reason and let our team of caseworkers know that this was the child He intended for us but I really don't see that happening at this point. We are waiting for a reason. Boy would I love to know that reason right now but I don't.
Okay what's with the elephant analogy? Well, upon very short inquiry on the web I found out that elephant's are pregnant for 22 months! Somewhere down the road I remember hearing this and feeling so much empathy for those elephant mothers. That is just a really long time to wait. Now I'm facing that same time frame myself. Realistically it could take us 22 months to see a picture of our daughter's face, to hear her birth name, to find out her age, to hear what history they have available of her and to start to fully attach to this little girl. Until then I just have to keep doing life.....meaning pour myself into my everyday routines, love on my kiddos at home, and pray for her and her birth family as much as possible. Sounds simple enough, right? I wish it was but the longing is always there and does not get easier with time. I must through all of that TRUST in my Lord. For some reason he has chosen Joel and I to parent this very special little girl, it's undeniable to us. There have been so many confirmations along the way that we can't deny that this is the path we are to take and He will complete this journey for us, no matter how long it takes. Someday we will cry over the first pictures we get of her, of hearing her name and eventually get to hold her in our arms for the very first time. I absolutely CAN'T wait to show you pictures of that!
So while we wait we humbly ask that you pray for the country of Ethiopia (that all adoptions go smoothly and happen in a timely manner), for our adoption agency and everyone that works for them (that they have Godly wisdom, walk in integrity, and give them strength to do their tasks), for our future daughter and her birth family (that she is healthy and doesn't go through any unnecessary trauma, that her parents are protected, that they have peace about every difficult decision that they must make, and that they come to know the Lord) finally for us as we wait that we would continue to learn all that God intends for us to along this journey.  Hopefully we will become some very happy "elephant" parents! :) 

1 comment:

Unknown said...

This blog post really helped me with something I'm waiting on...and of course I thought of you! Let me know what you think: http://everybitterthingissweet.com/2012/03/the-second-story-line/